NSW Interim Orders and Decision - Purpose of Affidavit?

[Louise too]

Put in your affidavit you want to spend quality time with your child and the arrangements in place now does not give your child and yourself to spend quality time together.
You could also mention in the mornings you spend ?hrs, in the afternoon you spend ?hrs.
Your solicitor will know how to word this for you.
I recommend you read the draft/affidavit after your solicitor is finished, if your not happy with it, make changes.
You’ll be fine.
I feel what you are asking shows how committed you are towards your child.

OK thank you heaps for your time replying to me... I will get onto the facebook posts and letter from boss.

Can I ask why would I mention the hours I spend with children in the morning and afternoons? Currently... or my proposed plan? And why mention that, please.

 

[sammy01]

I reckon affidavits need to be brief.

If you say you work weekends, you work weekends. If she says she works weekends then she works weekends. The magistrate will then explain that parenting is a fulltime job and if the kids are with you then you need to provide baby-sitting or change your work arrangements.

So the bare minimum a non-primary carer should expect - assuming no abuse/neglect is alternate weekends and half holidays. But that is a bit old school. These days magistrates must consider 50/50 where practical. Now that doesn't mean 50/50 is the starting point. Short version what you're proposing is in line with the prevailing wisdom.

Make sure you focus your case on (I know - you're gonna laugh). But you've gotta make your case about how the parents mostly getting along. That you can work with mum And more importantly, focus your case on the best interests of the kids... All too often parents get caught up in proving that the ex lied about work, or about something else. Family law is not about proving the ex is an idiot. It is about proving that your proposal is in the best interests of the kids.

 

[Louise too]

I reckon affidavits need to be brief.
If you say you work weekends, you work weekends. If she says she works weekends then she works weekends. The magistrate will then explain that parenting is a fulltime job and if the kids are with you then you need to provide baby-sitting or change your work arrangents.

So the bare minimum a non-primary carer should expect - assuming no abuse / neglect is alternate weekends and half holidays. But that is a bit old school
These days magistrates must consider 50/50 where practical. Now that doesn't mean 50/50 is the starting point. Short version what you're proposing is in line with the prevailing wisdom.

Make sure you focus your case on (I know - you're gonna laugh). BUT you've gotta make your case about how the parents mostly getting along. That you can work with mum And more importantly, focus your case on the best interests of the kids... All too often parents get caught up in proving that the ex lied about work, or about something else. Family law is not about proving the ex is an idiot. It is about proving that your proposal is in the best interests of the kids.

OK, thank you sammy01... I mainly want to focus on the fact that the Sundays afternoon are not working and due to her not being home/work/tired/sick etc and how she keeps changing arrangements last minute and how toxic drop-offs are when she abuses me in front of the kids.

This affects kids as she unreliable and the kids are too scared to look forward to seeing her as they are always unsure if she will turn up or not and then worried about how they are going get their school uniforms etc..and its a flow on effect with my work/less money/impatient boss, etc. I need plan so kids have 100% predictability of their routine and I can help work of permanent working arrangements.

 

[Alert]

ok thank you sammy01.... i mainly want to focus on the fact that the sundays afternoon are not working and due to her not being home/work/tired/sick etc and how she keeps changing arrangements last minute and how toxic drop offs are when she abuses me in front of the kids. this affects kids as she unreliable and the kids are too scared to look forward to seeing her as they are always unsure if she will turn up or not and then worried about how they are going get their school uniforms etc..and its a flow on affect with my work/less money/impatient boss etc i need plan so kids have 100% predictability of their routine and i can advise work of permanent working arrangements

Hey, there Louise too, I have had many affidavits, all these were during Interim Orders, it took 4yrs until Final Hearing.

I don’t know how this works in your state. I believe the more information you have is important, that way you/solicitor will not have anything that needs to be explained if questioned. When I suggest the hours morning/afternoon this will show the judge how much time you are spending now, which does not sound quality time. I also believe you have enough information with bosses letter, etc.

Like I said, your solicitor will know how to word this for you. More information proves you have thought of everything regarding the change and will also show as I said you are not spending the quality time.

Cheers, Louise too.

 

[Alert]

Hey there, Louise too,

I copied this from your post. I would mainly focus on what you have said below:

I mainly want to focus on the fact that the Sundays afternoon are not working and due to her not being home/work/tired/sick etc and how she keeps changing arrangements last minute me personally would not bag the mum, this could look as though you are vindictive and you need proof to back up your allegations. What I found when I was going through this crap, if parent was to say anything, the judge would want proof to back this up.

I see you are receiving conflicting advice. Don’t be brief in your affidavit, the more information you provide will benefit your case. You mentioned you have the text messages, so they will prove what you are saying regarding drop off, etc. The bare minimum you can provide may give you the bare minimum of what you want to be changed. I would have to strongly disagree with ‘keeping your affidavit brief’. You did say you have a solicitor, what help have you received?

 

[Alert]

Hey there, Louise too, another conflict is about focusing your case on how you can work with the children’s mum.

This is why you have your solicitor because you obviously can’t get along with mum, if you were able to get along why are you in Family Court. This is about you and your children. Because you are receiving conflicting information, I would ask your solicitor for advice, you are paying for the solicitor I would imagine? You have been in family court for a while now, right? Have you learnt from past experiences anything? Just ask your solicitor. How many times have changed the draft you are working on now?

 

[Alert]

Hope my suggestions could be of any help, until you receive more conflicting suggestions

Cheers Louise, too

 

[sammy01]

Ok, go to court with evidence from Facebook? Especially from the ex's facebook page. How easy is it to turn that into stalking?

So everything you present to the court is read by the solicitor. That is gonna cost. So keep it short.

Whether or not you can 'prove' that mum works or parties at the weekend are irrelevant. What is relevant is 'best interest of the kids'. The common territory these days is a mix of weekend and mid-week time. That is what you're proposing. So you're on a win.

Sure there is a conflict between you and the ex. If there wasn't she would not be your ex. She would be your partner. Keep this stuff simple. It isn't like she wants to raise them Muslim and you want to raise them Christian. You just disagree about when they should live with dad and when they should be with mum.

So keep it simple. Forget he said she said... That said, I reckon you can include in your chronology in the affidavit the dates that she has failed to meet on Sunday. Let me emphasise this. It is not your job to prove she is out partying on Saturday. Big deal. It is your job to explain why Thursday- Monday morning is a win.

forget how toxic the relationship is. Big deal, of course, it is toxic. It really doesn't matter.

Just focus on why your proposal is a good one.

Here is a link to a good website that explains what substantial and significant time is BTW the terms substantial and significant time appear in the legislation. I'm not making this stuff up.

What is Substantial & Significant Time with Children and when is it Ordered – DIY Family Law Austraila

So let me repeat myself - just focus on explaining why Thursday arvo - Monday morning once a fortnight is a good result of the kids. Your affidavit needs to focus on that, not facebook. Not work rosters

Cheers

 

[Alert]

Oh Sammy01 you make me

 

[Scruff]

Be careful monitoring someone elses Facebook page. If they're observant, they'll you're doing it.