NSW Partner's Ex Refusing Visitation until Consent Orders are in Place?

[speck1]

well done Hpflspmum- i know that sad tone in their voice!

At my end-her lawyer said, "she is not going to agree to the consent orders, please attend mediation,"

What the hell?

That's what they wanted mediation for, to get an agreement into consent?
I just want the certificate 60 now,

 

[sammy01]

hey Hpflspmum.... Don't engage with her text messages and swearing. NEVER EVER. If possible explain that you're only to happy to come to an agreement around child access and that consent orders are easy and can be done without solicitors IF an agreement can be made. Alternatively IF no agreement can be made then court is the only option.

I have not read all of this long thread but gee what a saga. Keep up the fight. BUT sadly, even with court orders you'll need to keep saving so you can make contravention applications...

 

[AllForHer]

Excellent work, @Hpflstpmum. That's progress in even the smallest degree, and I strongly suggest that you maintain the same calm tone in all communications with your partner's former spouse. Don't extend it beyond what is necessary, keep it business-like in that if you wouldn't say it to a client, don't say it to the ex.

Good work, though, I'm glad to hear your partner and his daughter got to speak.

 

[Hpflstpmum]

Thanks @speck1 How sad that you have to go through mediation again. It is looking that way for us too but we are waiting to see what the ex responds to my partner's lawyers with once they email her again.

Thanks @AllForHer it is such a relief that it didn't blow out any more than necessary but still good that she responded in the way we expected as it's just more ammunition for us when/if we go to court.

 

[speck1]

On Friday, an arvo-latest e-mail from ex's lawyer states that the matter has to go to mediation in two weeks and she won't sign anything for consent, says at mediation that an agreement needs to be reached and then drafted the into consent orders.

He said he can do it if I put $902.50 into his account.

If by magic an agreement is made, who should I get to draft consent? Or should i do it myself?

 

[AllForHer]

Did I read this wrong, or is your ex's lawyer asking you to pay him for consent orders?

As for who should draft consent orders, most mediation sessions where agreement is reached will result in the parenting plan (which can be submitted as consent orders) being written up on your behalf by either one of the legal representatives of the parties. You read through it and sign it if you agree, or you can take it away for consideration and not sign anything on the day. It's entirely up to you. You might consider having a lawyer read it, if not write it, before signing, because there are some standard orders that might be overlooked otherwise. These include clauses about denigration, resolving disputes, granting access to medical files, etc.

 

[Hpflstpmum]

Good luck @speck1 Hopefully you can reach an agreement and your ex doesn't change her mind like my partner's ex did!

 

[speck1]

AllForHer - He has offered to draft consent orders if an agreement is reached as a parenting plan at mediation. I pay $902.50 for half of fees for him to write it up

I am happy for him to do so and pay once signed and stamped, but he wants money deposited before he does it?

 

[speck1]

We have 3 x 1 hr mediation which I think is ridiculous, but anyway.

First one was last night and 45 mins of the hour was just talking about the policy/procedure, etc. which I have already heard before as I have done 2 meditations in the last 18 months.

Anyway, all that was talked about was my latest offers of consent orders which she denied.... She only has one thing she isn't happy about now before agreeing and that is "I can't work while the child is in my care"...

The mediator said it was odd and would be hard to enforce, etc. She wouldn't budge.

So next Friday, we are starting a parenting plan at mediation...which is going to be the same as my consent order offers basically. Anyway.

If an agreement is made and signed, we are getting put in consent orders----my question is, what in that two or three weeks after agreeing and before consent orders are signed and stamped, she makes her agreement redundant and won't sign by consent?

I think I'm actually better just going for certificate60.

 

[AllForHer]

Then I suppose you would have to look at proceedings for parenting orders as a serious option for getting the thing settled.

It's uncouth, in my view, for the mother to be risking court proceedings over a clause that no court would likely deem to be in a child's best interests anyway. It would be placing at risk your means of living. The court also tries to make its orders as equitable as possible - if you can't work, neither can she - so you'd almost be likely to get a better deal if you were to pursue a court-determined outcome.

Don't try and predict yet, though. She might get a hard word from the lawyer about it and change her tune before next mediation. Who knows.