QLD 50/50 shared care, child not attending school often in mother's care

[Rosscoe]

Yeah, it is a good idea to get the kid in front of a psychologist and get him talking to someone who has experience in such situations and can assist in determining what is the best outcome. It does seem that this will likely end in court though, if there is a history of not showing up to child interviews, failing to attend mediation etc. So book for the mediation, send half the bill to the OP too! But, go there prepared. In my situation although mediation ultimately failed we were able to agree to a family report writer privately which I think is beneficial to a judge, especially at interim hearing stage. I had already phoned a few family report writers before the mediation date and found out availability and gave these options to the ex at mediation. Personal feeling - if you have a psych report and family report mentioning even a few things you have stated on this thread I would think there are good grounds for a court to take action and protect the child.

In the mean time keep the pressure up on the OP

 

[sammy01]

I'd love you to try and get he Deputy Principal to put in writing that they think attendance at about 55% is satisfactory...

Sadly, there are a few pen pushers out there inside the teaching profession that have very good work avoidance strategies. Palming off you guys with a flippant remark like that is one such example.... My advice. Write to the principal. Outline your concerns. Once it is in writing they're stuffed if they don't respond. But if it is a meeting they can flap their lips around for 10-15 minutes before getting back to their busy admin work that means nothing.

Just my humble opinion about the executive members within some schools.
And yes - I take them to task with the same sorta gusto I use here... The principal at my school changes direction when he sees me coming these days and that is how I like it...

 

[Atticus]

My advice. Write to the principal. Outline your concerns. Once it is in writing they're stuffed if they don't respond

Good Advice

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Hi all,

So today after 17 days of waiting for an appointment with the teacher and wellness teacher to discuss the child's attendance throughout 2020, and if they are concerned the child is falling behind due to this, we receive an email from the deputy principle. She has suggested as there is little time left this year that we have a meeting at the beginning of the next school year with the child's new teacher. Said she understood our concerns of attendance as 'every day counts' - a sentence she threw at us in our meeting in February while telling us it was a family problem and they could not help.

To say we were upset is an understatement. We replied with an assertive email explaining her response is inappropriate considering our concerns are regarding the past year and the new teacher will not be able to help with our concerns or answer any questions. Reiterated what we would like to discuss with the current teacher.

We also pointed out that the current attendance notes in the child's One School account are not clear. 'mother collected' and 'child sick/drs appointment' does not clarify whether the child is saying he is unwell, being sent to sick bay, and school is contacting mother to collect. OR whether mother is going into school to collect child saying he has appointments (as we feel is the case but seem to have no way of proving). So we have requested more in depth notes in future for the child's One School account that states if a parents is contacted or called to the school. (My sister in law works in a state high school and said this is normal practice for them, but perhaps it is not for primary school?). It also really doesn't help our case if we go to court and the mother states she was called to the school continuously to collect the child as he was sick (although that alone may be worrying, implying the child is learning to be sick when in her care and not ours?)

We have requested an ASAP appointment to talk to the principle regarding the matter. Deputy has responded saying she will make sure the principle is aware we wish to talk to her ASAP, but has not mentioned an appointment with the child's current teacher - the only person we feel who will be able to state what is happening in class, and whether it is affecting the child's schooling. Feels like we are banging our heads against a wall when we really just want a couple of questions answered honestly. We do not want to know their opinion of the mother's parenting, we just want to know the facts. Are we expecting too much?

 

[Atticus]

We have requested an ASAP appointment to talk to the principle regarding the matter........ We do not want to know their opinion of the mother's parenting, we just want to know the facts. Are we expecting too much?

I don't think you are asking too much, & it's reasonable to expect a response from the principal IMO .... From what I have read regarding the 'every day counts initiative' It is after all the principal that has to make the call as to whether or not formal steps need to begin to address the absenteeism.. The first step to that is in identifying if that absenteeism is unexplained or unsatisfactory.... Doesn't look like that's even on their radar at this stage... IMO you should continue to make some consistent noise about it & have a paper trail of your efforts.

 

[sammy01]

Look wait till next year. Make sure SHE knows you're onto her from day one... You've given the school a head's up too and look, their isn't all that much they can do. If a parent rocks up and says little Timmy has an appointment, they're not gonna ask for proof and they don't have the right to..

The education system is broken when it comes to this sort of stuff. I've done notifications for kids at risk and I know all that happens is that a file gets created THAT IS ALL...

 

[Rosscoe]

I would also say, be pro-active on all fronts on your side. Keep the pressure up with the school, with the mother etc. Get the kid in front of a psychologist to talk about these issues too, as it seems he is ready and actually wanting to talk about it.

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Thanks everyone. We don't expect them to question the mother, we understand they have no place doing that or to determine if the reason for taking the child out of school is legitimate. But if they can start to record more accurate notes that state mother has advised child has medical appointment, if we were to attend court again, we could prove with Medicare records whether that is true or not.

Child isn't at school again today. Child actually tried telling me he was sick last Thursday and Friday. He wasn't and we sent him to school, but he was actually faking having a sniffle until I told him he had to go to school, then it stopped. Kind of concerning, but if having a sniffle at his mums means he doesn't have to go to school I get why he's learning to do it.

We are in the process of getting documentation to apply for NDIS and will def get the child a regular psychologist plus maybe an occupational therapist and someone he can talk to (previous experience with a psychologist they would speak to us and I want him to have someone to talk things over with now he's a bit older). Fingers crossed we get our meeting with the principle but we still really want to talk to his teacher.

 

[sammy01]

Or you're over thinking this.
As far as the school keeping more accurate notes. Not the school's job to run your family law case. Same with using Medicare records to 'prove' anything.... Your case... Kid misses too much school. Nice easy. HER case? well I'm guessing her case is that the kid has real medical issues and she can 'prove it' by using medical records.... GOOD LUCK WITH THAT... If I was a betting man your the horse I'm putting my money on in that race... What the kid is really really sick.... But only half the time, which happens to be the time the kid is in mum's care...

But - it does give me an idea.... Do your orders say anything about keeping the other parent informed of routine medical issues? If so she is probably 'breaching' by not 'informing you of medical issues' BTW the 'inverted commas' are because I don't believe her.

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Hi Sammy, thanks for the advice and I take note of the simplicity of your argument.

We do have orders relating to the child's medical (due to the mother seeking treatment for the child that we did not think was necessary and refusing to let us know about the appointments etc). Parents are ordered that the child attend a particular GP practice (to stop dr shopping concerns). Ordered to keep other parent informed of all drs/health care/treatment providers. And that each parent should keep the other informed of any medical condition, significant health issue or significant illness suffered by the child. My partner last week requested a copy of the child's Medicare records to make sure she is following these orders (during court it took them 5 or 6 weeks to send his records through though).

Finally got a call from the principle of the school today - I did have to call admin and advise I was concerned no one was able to even make an appointment for us.
She has advised that the school cannot discuss what happens with the child in the mother's care (and vice versa). I said ok, but we are wanting to discuss if the child is falling behind due to time off. She replied yes, but this is time off in the mother's care, so we can not discuss with you. Conversation went on for about 10 minutes but basically she isn't letting us talk to the child's teacher from the past year and is encouraging an appointment with the wellness teacher next year.

Does this sound right? It sounds fishy to me.