QLD Legal Aid Representation for Uncooperative Mothers?

[AllForHer]

That's great, particularly re: the paternal grandfather. That must be relief for dad.

Shame dad has to pay for the hair follicle test, but fair enough, I suppose, considering mum has also had one done.

Sounds like a really good outcome overall though, so good work!

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Yes, it was a massive relief, the mother seemed most worried about the paternal grandfather losing contact with the child. I just can't get my head around it.

We go away over the weekend for 2 weeks so are hoping by the time we get back my partner's hair might be long enough to be tested, fingers crossed!

We are especially relieved that there will be an ICL acting on the child's behalf now, fingers crossed my partner gets his phone call this week too

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

So we finally received the orders relief that paternal grandmother has been removed and can now spend time with the child. However, order number 7 appears to be missing? It only says 'That the mother' but doesn't say anything else. Can we contact someone for clarification as to whether there is supposed to be another order included? We don't want to annoy anyone.

Today we found out that the mother has also made a complaint about the paternal grandmother to the office of Health ombudsman and the Australia Health Practitioner Regulation Agency. All the complaints were filed on the same day as the phone call and day the letter was sent to our head office (the morning the mother received my partner's affidavit). Me and my partner feel she should get some legal advice on what she is best to do, but I think she just wants to avoid anymore stress. She hasn't dealt well so far with the DVO case etc and with her ex husband being back on the scene.

Tonight my partner has been ordered that he can call his son, the mother is currently refusing to provide her contact number even though the judge has ordered it. She has stated the due to the paternal grandmother still having an undertaking agreement she doesn't feel safe disclosing her number to my partner? (Doesn't make sense to us). My partner will call her mother's phone as a last resort, but the whole point in the judge ordering that the mother provide her number was to take the maternal grandmother out of the situation.

 

[sammy01]

I would not call maternal grandma. I would not even do a text message... Do you really want maternal grandma knowing your number? And what good can come of it? Don't call, you will be accused of harassment and they will go for an AVO based on it... Definitely don't call more than once... Otherwise it could be 'harassment'...

A text message? Maybe.. But it is going above and beyond... Mum was meant to give you the phone number, she hasn't, she has breached... You can chase your tail but stuff it, she ain't gonna let you speak to the kid. Do all that is reasonable, but don't go above and beyond that.....

As far as the term in the orders that is incomplete. You can get it removed via the slip rule, but chances are it is just a typo, so leave it alone...

 

[Lennon]

What has she complained to AHPRA about?

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

It was the mother who suggested calling the maternal grandmother's phone as that had been the only contact my partner had been allowed until these new orders, fortunately the mother has replied to my partner's text message via email with her number so he can call his son tonight

Yes there are many typos in the orders to be honest, I was quite surprised. Just concerned we are missing an order.

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Sorry Lennon I just saw your reply. The paternal grandmother works as a nurse. I haven't seen this new complaint as of yet, but the complaint to our hospital head office in Melbourne consisted of a copy of the undertakings, the interim protection order and a letter that basically stated that there are pending charges against the paternal grandmother and that the undertakings are viewed as highly as a DVO.

They know that the paternal grandmother works as a domestic violence contact for the hospital and I guess are trying to get the paternal grandmother into some kind of trouble. Fortunately the hospital was supportive and asked if there was anything they could do to help, but i'm not too sure what will be involved with these new complaints.

 

[Cairnsdad]

Hi Jade,

In my interim orders we had it set up under the phone contact that the parent with care on the particular day initiated the phone call. This was to stop my ex using excuses that they were having early dinner & in the bath etc and missed my calls as she had to give them the phone to call me between 5-6pm. It will also allow her to block her number when she rings if she chooses but make her look silly when dad has to initiate the call back to her when the little fella is with you.

Once the calls settle into a regular pattern after a few months things tend to get better with frequency and Dad may even be able to get a dedicated mobile phone so his son can call or text directly. (Depending on his age of course)

Cheers

 

[AllForHer]

Interesting development.

To get the orders clarified, you should e-mail a copy of the orders to the judge's associate and ask for clarification. Make sure you CC both the mother's lawyer and the ICL into the e-mail. Interim orders can be a bit iffy in their formality, but my view is that we're dealing with an over-worked and under-resourced institution here, so their capacity to give rightful attention to detail is limited. I proofread for a living and even I have been known to miss the odd spelling error.

I think it's important that you keep a timeline of mum's interference with grandma's employment. There are many judges in this state who would view such behaviour as intimidating. My husband's ex-wife wrote in a text message that I lied in one of my affidavits and that it could mean I lose my job, but when that was put before the Magistrate, I believe the exact phrase she used was 'I find that emotionally and psychologically abusive'.

Re: phone calls...look, you kind of a little bit want mum to contravene over this grandma stuff. It sucks for the kid, but it helps your case a lot, so just let her carry on whenever she sees fit, and quietly jot it down on your running sheet of missed care and communication events. The Court really, reeeeally doesn't like it when parents flout their obligations under the orders, so, you know, let the chips fall where they will.

 

[JadeGoldCoast]

Hi Cairnsdad, thanks for your input If mother keeps making issues about phone calls we may suggest an amendment to the order that the mother initiate the calls, currently though, if the mother misses a call for any reason then it is her responsibility to initiate a call that week. The child is only 4, but as soon as he is old enough I think having his own phone will be a brilliant idea and prevent a lot of this messing around.

My partner was able to call his son for a whole 2 minutes this afternoon before the child said goodbye and the call was disconnected. If this continues (as it did before the court process started when we could literally hear the mother distracting the child with a game on her phone and telling him to say goodbye) we will request an order that the calls be permitted to last for a minimum of 10 minutes.

We will def keep a timeline of all events from now until this is all sorted. I have said to my partner that even though it would be ideal for mother to follow the orders, if she does contravene them then she is only harming herself in the long run, and we need to look at the bigger picture rather than the immediate upset that is caused.

Thanks for the help about contacting the judges associate about the orders, I thought that would be the best person to contact, but do not want to get onto the bad side of the courts/ICL etc in any way!