NSW Changing consent orders ??

[Ben10]

Hi, I have consent orders for my 3 year old. The consent orders are only 18months old.
I signed those orders when I was kicked out of my home, had an avo on me and was living on a friends floor only seeing my child 8 hours a week). I have since settled with the ex am back home and the avo has expired. I’m in a much much stronger financial position with than the ex as it was such a short relationship so she couldn’t take me to the cleaners. I am semi retired, financially secure and have plenty of free time. My question is I don’t see my daughter enough. I see her 2nights one week and two days the other week. I love being a dad more than anything in the world. I’m paying child support 200% Over what I would have to and have agreed to pay all private school fees. Any ideas on how I can change the consent orders to see my daughter up to 50% of the time. My ex is very nasty and won’t agree to me having any more access. I don’t make any decisions on my daughter and the ex doesn’t share any information with me. I don’t even know where they live.

 

[Been2Trial]

It sounds like you might have a chance at overturning the consent orders given some of what you have said. From what I understand, court stamped consent orders are normally final (just like regular court orders) and to otherwise have them revisited and re-considered, you would have to meet the Rice & Asplund threshold, which basically draws a line in the sand saying "there must be a significant change of circumstance.

Just my opinion, but the way that Consent Orders are treated by the courts is/has been/can be very problematic. Scary even.

When they are utilized by two reasonably co-operative, level headed parents who are in rare blissful agreement during a separation, they of course serve their purpose of cutting down court time and resources whilst providing both parties with known-knowns.

However, I can see that far too often, they are being used by one spiteful parent who is holding all the cards during the early stages of a separation/custody dispute in a sneaky, dishonest and unfair manner. (Eg. When one of the parents ends the relationship and takes the child/children with them, keeping them from the other vulnerable parent, they spring these consent orders on them hoping to sneak a quick victory.)

Its sadly all too common to hear stories of Consent Orders being presented by the parent who is holding all the cards to the other parent who is highly stressed, confused and not seen their child for weeks or months. On top of this, that parent might still be trying to comprehend the stressful reality of the separation with the world falling apart around them. All of this leaves them potentially prone to making uninformed decisions without understanding just how set in concrete these Consent Orders are, signing them in desperation to see their child and regain some direction.

My ex tried it on with me and I have read of many others here who have fallen victim to this tactic themselves and it really is something that needs to be addressed asap.

Anyway, personal rant over, back to you -

* How long have you been living in your own home now? I think the court will want you to be able to demonstrate that it is a stable, long term arrangement... but that should be fairly easy.
* Was the AVO supported or proven? (ie. is there a record of actual family violence in your case?)

Someone might correct me, but I would argue that there has indeed been a significant change in circumstance occur since you signed the Consent Orders that warrant a reconsideration by the courts.

The most obvious one is that at the time those orders were made, you were in an unstable living arrangement that you felt wasn't conducive of the best interests of your child.
This living arrangement has now changed significantly - from living on someones couch to living in your own stable home is a very significant change IMO - its chalk and cheese.

Other potential points you could raise to support your case could be (and I'm not sure how much weight they would hold in court, but someone else could chime in here):

Your child is now significantly older than when the orders were first signed;
The current Consent Orders were hastily written and lacked long term foresight ie. they failed to set out a reasonable step up increase in the childs time spent with you as they grew older.
You were pressured and uninformed about the long term nature of these orders, unaware that they were completely set in stone and permanent.

Again, the three above points will probably just be seen as "bad luck, you should have known and understood what you were signing before you signed it". The courts might take the position that you should have taken into consideration the likelyhood that you wouldnt be on someones couch forever when you agreed to the current arrangement. These things might help sway the case for reconsideration your way overall, provided the living arrangement bit is considered a valid argument.

Good luck with it - I feel for guys who got railed into this position you're in by an ex that holds all the power.

Hopefully someone else can provide another opinion for you too

 

[CSFLW]

Hi Ben

Do you have parenting orders or just property orders??

 

[Ben10]

Hi Ben

Do you have parenting orders or just property orders??

Hi,

Both have been done.

 

[CSFLW]

Do you want to change the parenting orders?

 

[Ben10]

Do you want to change the parenting orders?

Yep

 

[CSFLW]

Do the orders say you spend time with the child??

 

[Ben10]

Yes. Two days one week and two nights the other week.

 

[Ben10]

I would like 50/50.
I’m way more stable in every aspect other than I’m a man....

 

[sammy01]

A few thoughts. And a few contradictions.
1. Wait another year. Arguing for more time with a 5 yr old is easier than a 3 yr old.
2. Organise mediation. It will likely fail but you will have something to show the magistrate that demonstrates you've been wanting more time.
3. The time u have isn't terrible given the age of the kid.
The contradictions.
1. Apply to court as a contravention. She is obliged to tell u where the kid lives and I'm sure there will be other things like not informing u of medical stuff. while in court on those mmatters ask for extra time.
2. Get started now as the court process could take a year and the kid will be older.
3. Ask for more time and if she refuses stop paying. Pay child support according to the child support agency rules.