VIC Birth Certificate - Ex Giving Child a New Name?

[KKaren]

It doesn’t seem you are open to any discussion unless someone agrees with you. What she does in her time is her business. She’s not telling you what to do. Your comments about giving your son another name seem to be just being spiteful to the mother, as opposed to putting the child’s best interests first.

Calling your son a cultural name hurts no one. Your reaction hurts your son and his mother.

 

[Muxaul]

I think you miss the point. The point is he doesn’t have a new name. She is calling him a cultural name. You can fight it, or roll with it. You are saying she shouldn’t have the right to call him a name, but you should have the right to prevent her. You’re making a drama when there is none.

Also I get your point “you can fight it or roll with it”. It seems like a no win situation.

It doesn’t seem you are open to any discussion unless someone agrees with you. What she does in her time is her business. She’s not telling you what to do. Your comments about giving your son another name seem to be just being spiteful to the mother, as opposed to putting the child’s best interests first.

Calling your son a cultural name hurts no one. Your reaction hurts your son and his mother.

I thank you for your comments KKAREN. I also appreciate that you do recognise it’s a bad thing if I do the same thing his mom did to call my son a new culture name.

What I still don’t understand is since if I do it unilaterally it’s a bad behaviour, why is that “it does not hurt anyone” if his mom did it first. Shouldn’t her behaviour be bad, hurt him and his dad too?

Anyway, What I’ll do is to take Jack’s suggestion and just keep calling my son his real name.

 

[KKaren]

His mother gave him a cultural name. It clearly is important to here. So what? You don’t like it.

The only reason you have given to giving your son another name is to spite his mother. She’s done it for cultural reasons. You would do it to be spiteful. Massive difference.

 

[Muxaul]

His mother gave him a cultural name. It clearly is important to here. So what? You don’t like it.

The ONLY reason you have given to giving your son another name is to spite his mother. She’s done it for cultural reasons. You would do it to be spiteful. Massive difference.

It seems like we are not getting each other’s points across. My problem is “making unilateral decision when it should be a joint decision”. Correct me if I’m wrong, it seems to me that either you do not think naming a child should be a joint decision, or whoever made the move first is justifiable.

If it’s the latter, then to me it is encouraging non-cooperative parenting, not co-parenting, and sends a message that a parent should do more unilateral decision in the name of the best interest of the child to set status quo. And if the other parent objects then he/she is spiteful.

 

[sammy01]

Old mate... yes it is poor form on behalf of the ex. My ex tried the same bs... she wanted the kids to have her maiden name. Their birth certificates have my last name.

Yes bad form.... but the ex doesn't really want the kid to have a new name. Nope. The ex wanted to piss u off and it has worked. No legal advice from me today. Just some life experience.... stress less. While your name is on the birth certificate she can't legally change it.

So this is not about the kid and his name. This is all about the ex playing silly games and she won because u let yourself get stressed about it. Mate my mission is to live longer than my ex. To achieve this goal I am constantly reminding myself to stress less to live longer...

 

[Muxaul]

Old mate... yes it is poor form on behalf of the ex. My ex tried the same bs... she wanted the kids to have her maiden name. Their birth certificates have my last name.

Yes bad form.... but the ex doesn't really want the kid to have a new name. Nope. The ex wanted to piss u off and it has worked. No legal advice from me today. Just some life experience.... stress less. While your name is on the birth certificate she can't legally change it.

So this is not about the kid and his name. This is all about the ex playing silly games and she won because u let yourself get stressed about it. Mate my mission is to live longer than my ex. To achieve this goal I am constantly reminding myself to stress less to live longer...

Mate you nailed it.