QLD Rights the Father will Have Once DVO has Expired?

[Celia Woodbridge]

You a

So here is a Father who was Alienated from his child just weeks into its life, so you took out a DVO, no charges have ever been laid in relation to your "so-called" abuse, and the Father has also abided by the DVO and no breaches have been carried out in the two years the DVO was put on him. The fact that you wont even foster a relationship between not only the Father but also the paternal Grandmother is deplorable. So it was quite alright for you to go to bed with this fellow then carry the child for 9 months, but then have him removed from the childs life by way of a DVO, with no charges being carried on the DVO was served. All I can say is, how do you live yourself.... and I seriously hope, if not the Father but the Grandmother take it to court so they get some quality time with the child.

Secondly, how is it a 2 year Protection order, when it was taken out when the child was 4 months and its now finished and the child is 11.5 months... sounds like a 6 month DVO to me.

To answer your legal question, just tell the police you live in fear and you require the DVO extended...just make sure you keep alienating your child.

I can only hope Pauline Hanson gets her way with 50/50 being the norm in courts, as this is a perfect example of where it should be used.

You are a nasty piece of work who clearly has your own issues going on.

I assure you I did not merely alienate my son from his father because I don't like him.

See my reply further down for more details. I loved this man, we were together for over two years, i had no idea he would turn into a jealous abusive monster as soon as our first child was born, he didn'y even know that's how he would manage or more accurately not manage the adjustment to fatherhood and the change to our relationship dynamic going from a couple to a family and being focussed on the baby as opposed to him getting all my attention.

Yeah it's really immature but he did some extremely disgusting things to our son as a newborn out of hate, anger n jealousy (he told me himself that's what triggered it) and I am lucky that my son doesn'y have serious or life long physical problems because of what his father did to him.

 

[Celia Woodbridge]

So here is a Father who was Alienated from his child just weeks into its life, so you took out a DVO, no charges have ever been laid in relation to your "so-called" abuse, and the Father has also abided by the DVO and no breaches have been carried out in the two years the DVO was put on him. The fact that you wont even foster a relationship between not only the Father but also the paternal Grandmother is deplorable. So it was quite alright for you to go to bed with this fellow then carry the child for 9 months, but then have him removed from the childs life by way of a DVO, with no charges being carried on the DVO was served. All I can say is, how do you live yourself.... and I seriously hope, if not the Father but the Grandmother take it to court so they get some quality time with the child.

Secondly, how is it a 2 year Protection order, when it was taken out when the child was 4 months and its now finished and the child is 11.5 months... sounds like a 6 month DVO to me.

To answer your legal question, just tell the police you live in fear and you require the DVO extended...just make sure you keep alienating your child.

I can only hope Pauline Hanson gets her way with 50/50 being the norm in courts, as this is a perfect example of where it should be used.

And yes you over opinionated assumptive a**hole, it is a 2 year protection order. I never said it has ended, it ends in March 2019.

From the things you have said it's clear you would take the stance of - a parent who has sexually assaulted their own child should still have a relationship with them! ... if you think a parent who physically assaulted their own child deserves a relationship with them or it is in the best interest of the child to have a relationship with them there is something very seriously wrong with you!

The protection order in place believe it or not is 100% based on true events and is 100% in place to physically protect my son. It isn't a situation where one parent is just choosing to be an immature ass hole and stop their kid from seeing the other parent because of relationship issues.

I loved this man, this was a traumatic and heart wrenching situation for me to go through and i was shocked, and had to suddenly go from what was supposed to be a happy lovely 3 person family to being a first time single mum protecting my son from the person I loved and who was supposed to love my son as much as I did.

Do you know what that is like? It is fcked up. I thought we would be a happy little family and in a few years have more kids!! But no, nothing could prepare any of us for how things changed.. how he changed so suddenly!

 

[sammy01]

Ok slow down... Some of your language is not ok. Neither is your attitude of calling other people overly opinionated.... Three posts in a row is pretty opinionated. And yep you're right Migz clearly has his own issues, but so do you and so do I...

And nope he ain't a nasty piece of work, no more so than you, or me... He has had to fight to see his kid and has been accused of all sorts of crap, bit like your ex... Maybe he did it, maybe your ex did it. But given that neither Migz nor your ex have actually been found guilty of anything - then the abuse did not happen not legally...

This is a law forum... Your child was protected via an AVO. Ok no worries. Yup he accepted without admission. Again, doesn't prove guilt. The threshold for a magistrate to approve an AVO is not beyond reasonable doubt. It is on the grounds of probability (which is a pretty low threshold)...

The advice 2 solicitors gave me when my ex took one against me was to accept without admission - it does not mean guilt.... But trying to defend an AVO is so bloody hard that it is best to accept without admission. So you are wrong when you say he accepted it that 'everything' you have said is true... What is true is that an AVO that restrained him from coming near his child was issues. He accepted the terms of the AVO without admission. Doesn't mean he has plead guilty Not even close.

But he could have sought access to the child through mediation or the family law court. It would appear that he did not? I did ask earlier in this thread about whether or not mediation was attempted but you didn't answer?

Now something else really really concerns me.... See you went to the police, you made a statement accusing your ex of child abuse but no charges with laid? Hang on...

Now this is a law forum. Nope your ex did not physically assault your son... That is your accusation. He has not been found guilty. But let me express an opinion as a parent. If anyone physically assaulted my kid, I'd want the full force of the law to be applied. Why was your ex not charged with assault? Why as a parent did you not seek that?

So - the thing is the facts are, you have accused dad of abuse. It was not proven in a court. So legally speaking, it did not happen. So that means dad has not seen his kid because you have done nothing to facilitate it... Now I hope you can see how this looks at this end.

No court has found him guilty... So you have decided to make yourself judge, juror and executioner. Oh and it ain't good enough to keep the kid away from dad... You're gonna keep the kid away from dad's family too, for good measure.

So - you're worried that once the AVO ends dad could pick the kid up from pre-school... Legally, there is nothing to stop him... So how to fix that? Well I'll answer that in a minute...

I've been multi-tasking...

In the 15 minutes it has taken me to write this I've done another search for some family law cases.
I like this one.
http://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FamCA/2014/178.html?context=1;query=childabuse

Mum has refused access to child, going so far as to remove the child from Australia... Mum accused dad of sexually abusing the child.. End result? Child lives with dad and spends no time with mum...

Ouch - that could be your future...

So my suggestion - Call relationships Australia ask them to do mediation with you and dad. Offer the dad some time with the kid, preferably with grandma there as supervision. Go on, dare ya. See that way you'll be on your way towards getting an arrangement where dad cant just pick the kid up and leave because he will have that right once the avo ends. But if you do mediaton and come up with an agreement, that can be written into consent orders and that will mean that there will be limitations on when dad can see the kid.

I have been very patient in writing a response I did as these questions before.

Is dad paying child support?

Has mediation been attempted? Initiated? Anything?

 

[AllForHer]

Thanks for that information re DVO's vs parenting orders. No actually I did not know that as law isn't my area of expertise (obviously, why else would I be seeking help). I was going merely off what was explained to me following the court hearing for the DVO by the judge, obviously I misunderstood the info she gave me.

Yes my son's father was at court for the DVO hearing and he accepted everything, while he had the option to disagree with it and say no, I didn't do any of that or it's all lies. He accepted it because everything was 100% true!

Well, it might be an accept without admissions situation. If he denied it and asked to have it tried at a hearing, he probably would have lost, be it because the evidence against him was persuasive or simply because the Court tends to make DVOs fairly freely, but whatever the situation, the current circumstance is this: you have a DVO against dad, so he can't contact you. That's all. There's nothing more to it until you've been served with an initiating application for parenting orders, and that may never happen. Not much point worrying about things you can't control, so for now, just take care of yourself and your son.

 

[nat 2015]

Wow, what nerve do you think you have. I posted on here to get some non-judgmental legal help regarding an extremely important situation to me.

How dare you judge, assume and share such a horrible negative opinion of me when all I sought was some unbiased legal advice. For your information, the DVO is a 2 year DVO, it ends in March of 2019. I was seeking help early so I knew what to expect or how to plan for when it ends.

I did tell the police the reason I was hesitant about making statements was because I was scared of how my son's father would retaliate as he is an extremely spiteful, unstable and dangerous person. I did not join this site and ask for legal input so that someone could fill in blanks themselves of my life and judge me and my decision-making when they have no idea what my life has been like nor any idea of what my son's father put him through as a newborn, how dare you!

I have done so far everything in my power to protect my son which is exactly what a mother should do! I didn't merely 'alienate' my son from his father because I don't like him (as you seem to feel is the case). I sought plenty of advice and did exactly what I needed to do to protect my son!

You know if I hadn't followed the legal advice and organised the DVO and ant further abuse occurred while all 3 of us remained living in the same home, I could have been considered a neglectful mother and child services would have removed my child from both him and I as I would have not done what the law considers as necessary for a mother to do to protect their child.

When I went to court for the DVO the judge was so disgusted at the incidents I had honestly documented, along with a letter from my parents they wrote as witnesses describing the incidents they had been around for she first asked if my son had been checked out by a doctor since the abuse occurred (which obviously he had, I had made sure he was checked out by 2 different doctors). She then said good because this man should never be allowed anything to do with your son again, the things he did yo your son could have left him with permanent brain damage and dislocated hips.

I have not merely alienated my son from his father for bull s**t reasons or because I merely don't like him. It was a very serious, traumatic situation to go through and I sure as hell hope none of you ever have to bear witness to the man you loved and had been with for over two years suddenly changing into a physically abusive monster as soon as your first baby was born and harming your newborn.

How dare any of you judge me and assume things. He seriously abused his own newborn son and not just once! How can any of you take this as me merely alienating my son from his father for personal relationship reasons?

You know he also had the option in court to disagree with any and all incidents documented on the DVO application. He could have said 'No I do not accept this, I did not do anything documented here, or no this is all lies' and things would have been looked into and the DVO wouldn't have automatically been placed. But he didn't he accepted it, no qualms whatsoever as everything in kt was 100% true.

You lot are horrible. I am a great mum and have done everything a mother should do to protect their child upon occurrence of a horrendous unforeseen and totally unexpected damaging situation.

Hey, can I say this to you - I, too, have experienced this kind of response from the same users. It's appalling that they feel the need to speak like this about situations that are at times tough to deal with. We come on here for help, not to be attacked.

Keep your chin up and you will find someone on here who is not bitter and twisted from past relationships. I still get smart arse remarks from the same users by them making comments in other people's questions...

 

[AllForHer]

With utmost respect, @nat 2015, the reason you perhaps don't like our responses is because they don't align with what you want to hear. It has nothing to do with bitterness about past relationships, and everything to do with reality-checking the facts of your case against the effect of the legislation. I apologise if you feel offended, but I'm sure you can appreciate the frustration we experience at being asked the same set of questions on the same set of facts over and over again because our answers don't align with your expectations.

 

[nat 2015]

No that's not the case at all. I know I have asked the same questions in some posts several times,but I can also see where this person feels attacked. It's nothing to do with not wanting to hear what a person wants to hear, I am not offended by what you have said at all and if I am going to be honest I sometimes ranted like a crazy person....