QLD Grounds for Changing Family Court Orders?
- Thread starter Jamstan
- Start date
OK so you have to be realisitic...
My thoughts - sit with kids, tell them that if they want the parenting arrangements changed you will do what you can to make it happen. Be realistic with them, tell them about the complications delicately... And do one more thing - tell them not to answer you straight away, unless they want to...
Tell them that you want them to think about what they want and you will see what you can do to achieve it.
Look is living with you majority of the time also possible? If so, you can go to mum and say is she is gonna make it hard on the kids, they just might choose to stay with you guys...
Last thought - rarely do people do things like this without having pressure applied. Asking for more time ain't helping, unless it suits her.... So you'll have to apply some pressure to get her to become more flexible.
My thoughts - sit with kids, tell them that if they want the parenting arrangements changed you will do what you can to make it happen. Be realistic with them, tell them about the complications delicately... And do one more thing - tell them not to answer you straight away, unless they want to...
Tell them that you want them to think about what they want and you will see what you can do to achieve it.
Look is living with you majority of the time also possible? If so, you can go to mum and say is she is gonna make it hard on the kids, they just might choose to stay with you guys...
Last thought - rarely do people do things like this without having pressure applied. Asking for more time ain't helping, unless it suits her.... So you'll have to apply some pressure to get her to become more flexible.
Thank you.
We did ask the kids today and they said yes and the older one said "yes, more than ever". So we will explain further the possible fallout while we try it.
By applying pressure do you mean going to mediation? I would like to do that but I'm concerned she will say I'm not stable as I left before all of a sudden. But that was three years ago. The last year I have been consistent and never been late on child support or picking/dropping boys off. Have kept most of the texts from last 6 months that show that.
We did ask the kids today and they said yes and the older one said "yes, more than ever". So we will explain further the possible fallout while we try it.
By applying pressure do you mean going to mediation? I would like to do that but I'm concerned she will say I'm not stable as I left before all of a sudden. But that was three years ago. The last year I have been consistent and never been late on child support or picking/dropping boys off. Have kept most of the texts from last 6 months that show that.
I realise you have 2 different threads going at the same time. I will confine my response to only this one.
1. You will likely need to overcome the R&A (Rice v Asplund) threshold if the matter goes to court.
2. If you withhold the children, without good reason, you will be breaching the orders and the other parent will be able to make an application contravention.
3. If the Judge determines that revisiting the orders is appropriate, and another Family Report is conducted in the course of proceedings, be weary of the possibility that discussions with children of this age (rather than directly with the other parent) in terms of giving them the choice and/or leading to any unilateral decisions of a parent contrary to the Court orders, could be viewed as 'influence' of that parent and/or negatively by the Court (for that parent).
I realise you have said you felt pressured in consenting to the orders and that you didn't realise you were signing away your rights. Just in case you were not aware as you were self represented.. In Family Law, all rights are those of the child/ren. Not of the parents.
1. You will likely need to overcome the R&A (Rice v Asplund) threshold if the matter goes to court.
2. If you withhold the children, without good reason, you will be breaching the orders and the other parent will be able to make an application contravention.
3. If the Judge determines that revisiting the orders is appropriate, and another Family Report is conducted in the course of proceedings, be weary of the possibility that discussions with children of this age (rather than directly with the other parent) in terms of giving them the choice and/or leading to any unilateral decisions of a parent contrary to the Court orders, could be viewed as 'influence' of that parent and/or negatively by the Court (for that parent).
I realise you have said you felt pressured in consenting to the orders and that you didn't realise you were signing away your rights. Just in case you were not aware as you were self represented.. In Family Law, all rights are those of the child/ren. Not of the parents.
Thank you. Yes, sorry about the double thread. Ok so what I am wondering is if 1. This has been reached?
2. I never have withheld the children, but she has given more time herself (in exchange for payments). I return always on the dot at whatever time is specified unless there was a miscommunication (ie she said dinner time but wouldn't give an exact time).
3. OK. I think I understand. We have asked how they feel to determine if we should pursue it, but we should stop discussing the idea in terms of them having a decision or that it is up to them to say they want to live with us (ie coaching.)...
Is this correct?
Thanks again.
2. I never have withheld the children, but she has given more time herself (in exchange for payments). I return always on the dot at whatever time is specified unless there was a miscommunication (ie she said dinner time but wouldn't give an exact time).
3. OK. I think I understand. We have asked how they feel to determine if we should pursue it, but we should stop discussing the idea in terms of them having a decision or that it is up to them to say they want to live with us (ie coaching.)...
Is this correct?
Thanks again.
My view is that it's likely you'll need to pass the Rice & Asplund threshold to have the Court consider changing the existing orders. This means you'll need to show there has been a significant change in circumstances since the orders were made such that a change to the orders is warranted.
This is probably going to be a bit tricky because the circumstances when the order was made are basically the same as they are now, regardless of the fact that you moved away during that time (and unfortunately, the Court doesn't accept "I was overwhelmed by the process" as an excuse for not reading a document before signing it). You might have grounds to argue the kids are older and expressing a desire to spend more time with you, but not sure how persuasive that would be.
You might like to look into a child-inclusive mediation conference with the mother. This is where a child specialist will talk to your kids first and determine what they want the care arrangements to be, then bring this information to you and the mother so it can be taken into consideration during discussions.
You could try your hand at Court. There's no way to predict an outcome.
This is probably going to be a bit tricky because the circumstances when the order was made are basically the same as they are now, regardless of the fact that you moved away during that time (and unfortunately, the Court doesn't accept "I was overwhelmed by the process" as an excuse for not reading a document before signing it). You might have grounds to argue the kids are older and expressing a desire to spend more time with you, but not sure how persuasive that would be.
You might like to look into a child-inclusive mediation conference with the mother. This is where a child specialist will talk to your kids first and determine what they want the care arrangements to be, then bring this information to you and the mother so it can be taken into consideration during discussions.
You could try your hand at Court. There's no way to predict an outcome.
So in the first instance why not write to her with a proposal for 50/50 - sounds like you've already tried that???
ok so you need the certificate to say you tried mediation before you can even apply to court.... So mediation would be one approach
You could see a solicitor and ask solicitor to write to her, inviting her to come to a compromise and in the event that she chooses not to then you'll apply to court. A good solicitor will write something that implies that you'll be successful in court and as such she should just play nice...
So are you prepared to take it to court?
So her case will be that 3 years ago you were unstable / unrealiable.... ok that was 3 years ago... But you have a bloody good counter argument.... You have been consistent for the last 12 months.
ok so you need the certificate to say you tried mediation before you can even apply to court.... So mediation would be one approach
You could see a solicitor and ask solicitor to write to her, inviting her to come to a compromise and in the event that she chooses not to then you'll apply to court. A good solicitor will write something that implies that you'll be successful in court and as such she should just play nice...
So are you prepared to take it to court?
So her case will be that 3 years ago you were unstable / unrealiable.... ok that was 3 years ago... But you have a bloody good counter argument.... You have been consistent for the last 12 months.
Yup - no more communication with kids. Look you need their input - be bloody horrid to start the process only for the kids to say no thanks...
So, yep, you'd have to reach the Rice and Asplund. But that is only if it was to get to court, most cases get sorted well before then.
Oops one more thing - what sort of time do the current orders provide?
So, yep, you'd have to reach the Rice and Asplund. But that is only if it was to get to court, most cases get sorted well before then.
Oops one more thing - what sort of time do the current orders provide?
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