Banks have a lot of experience with divorcing couples and in many cases they don't mind too much as long as you keep them advised as to progress. They will want to see progress being made on resolving the issue. If the mortgage is close to the max lending value they will be nervous; if the mortgage is low, they'll be more relaxed knowing they'll still get their money. Must however keep the bank informed and might pay to word up the bank up in advance as to what may happen and what steps you are undertaking to minimise their risk. Doable, but will take effort, and the goodwill of your local manager.
There are laws around financial hardship you can read up about. Might be useful.
Keep in mind if she has initiated the separation and you were against the idea, then she is likely already 3 steps ahead of you in planning her future. She might be looking for clues from you about your thinking and when she sees you at the next stage of your thinking she'll activate the next step in her well thought out plan. In which case you you need to play catch up very quickly. Separate the emotion from the planning. Very hard for many guys to do this, so just accept you are likely about to enter a hard stage in life, and take steps to minimise the amount of time you spend in this stage. I spent too much time wallowing around feeling sorry for myself and could have handled my split much better, but didn't have the advantage of all the material that is around on the internet. You can get past this, and use mensline for the really bad days.
There are laws around financial hardship you can read up about. Might be useful.
Keep in mind if she has initiated the separation and you were against the idea, then she is likely already 3 steps ahead of you in planning her future. She might be looking for clues from you about your thinking and when she sees you at the next stage of your thinking she'll activate the next step in her well thought out plan. In which case you you need to play catch up very quickly. Separate the emotion from the planning. Very hard for many guys to do this, so just accept you are likely about to enter a hard stage in life, and take steps to minimise the amount of time you spend in this stage. I spent too much time wallowing around feeling sorry for myself and could have handled my split much better, but didn't have the advantage of all the material that is around on the internet. You can get past this, and use mensline for the really bad days.
