SA Ex in another state, offers to pay flights

[Bravestone]

So my ex hasn't had much to do with our children since he left, has seen them 4 times over 4yrs with up to 18mths between contact. Anyway he saw them early this year for a few hrs then 2 days later left the state. Now he wants me to bring them to him, he has offered to pay for flights but I have to stay with him and his friends or his parents which I don't feel comfortable doing. But do I have the right to say no or do I have to seeing as he will be paying for the flights? To me I feel that i need to see more effort on his behalf to have any sort of relationship with them. I see it as he can afford to fly 3 ppl to him why can't he fly one to where we are and start forming a relationship with the children before expecting me to being them to him, I realise this is probably not legally my option as to why I'm asking where exactly I stand in this situation.
Thank you

 

[sammy01]

how old are the kids?
Do you have any obligation? NO. Especailly given he wants you do stay with him. That would be akward. You're well within your rights to ask him to find a different solution.

 

[Bravestone]

The kids are 5 and 7. I wouldn't trust him to actually send them home or his family to either.
I know right so awkward

 

[Tim W]

I don't do very much Family Law (that is, one job a year, if that).
So factor that in when deciding how much notice to take of what I say below.

1. That he is offering to pay the fares doesn't give him any extra rights.
   
   
2. My guess?
   He's probably been fed some ill-informed rubbish about
   his "father's rights", and been told that "you should this" or "you should that".
   
   
3. Your kids are not property.
   Putting their wellbeing ahead of everything else, as you are doing,
   is a good mindset.
   It's also the underlying philosophy of how Family Law works.
   
   
4. Unless there are Parenting Orders or somesuch, or some other sort
   of existing agreement, then you have no obligations, either way.
   Absent any arrangements, you are free to say no, without having to give reasons.
   
   
5. Is he paying Child Support?
   It can be helpful to understand that paying Child Support
   does not create an automatic right to have "access" (as they used to call it).
   Lots of people don't understand this.
   
   
6. Given this....

   ..I wouldn't trust him to actually send them home or his family to either...

   being careful like you are is a sensible, prudent choice.