Yes.. They have the orders. How they work seems confusing but no mistaking Fridays is my time. Easily can be seen.
Yes.. They have the orders. How they work seems confusing but no mistaking Fridays is my time. Easily can be seen.
ok - so let's put Corona virus aside for the minute.
Get active with the child care centre.Do they have a mailing list? are you on it? get on it.
A facebook page? A parents and community comittee? be on them.
What are there rules around parent volunteers. Your orders say something about shared parental responsibility? have a read. Do the orders say anything specific about preventing you attending school events? They probably wont... So if you wanna play this hard and I kinda suggest you should - Then be a parent volunteer for an hour or two once a month. But be guided by the child care centre... Don't be the pushy parent... Don't insist on being in there every day.
See how you go.
And This will do two cool things.
1. You'll look like an active involved parent. Looks good in court.
2. It will piss her off.... Good.
Get active with the child care centre.Do they have a mailing list? are you on it? get on it.
A facebook page? A parents and community comittee? be on them.
What are there rules around parent volunteers. Your orders say something about shared parental responsibility? have a read. Do the orders say anything specific about preventing you attending school events? They probably wont... So if you wanna play this hard and I kinda suggest you should - Then be a parent volunteer for an hour or two once a month. But be guided by the child care centre... Don't be the pushy parent... Don't insist on being in there every day.
See how you go.
And This will do two cool things.
1. You'll look like an active involved parent. Looks good in court.
2. It will piss her off.... Good.
Hey... Thanks for the input.
Yes I'm on the mailing list. Had a long email discussion with the area rep. About the issues heading to the centre and being kept informed on my daughters education.
Saying at first they can't grant me access to the facility or my daughter without the mothers permission in her court ordered time.
Then when I said my time at the centre was in my time under orders they have access too...the rep Quickly changed tatic and said my time under orders isnt valid because the other parent hasn't handed my daughter back.
Then I queried how I'm surpossed to be involved in my daughters education if I'm not allowed in the centre especially considering all these places have events throughout the year and how much I've missed out on despite requesting all this since Nov last year.
I posed that question a few times. The rep would never answer.
Then I queried why I have never received anything in relation to my daughters settling in and develop. The rep said everything we do is on a app, but I will confirm with the centre.
A few hours later they sent me development reports etc from 2019.
So I forwarded her an email from mid Jan 2020, where I queried never having any information about events or development being forwarded to me. the manager of the centre told me the same... Everything's on their app and there's nothing else, we have done nothing. I have everything the same as the other parent.
So being involved there is impossible.
The issue I i guess a good percentage of separated parents have a capacity to atleast discuss and arrange things. Having orders saying "equal and shared parental responsibility" in our situation is meaningless.
That specifically doesn't state either parent has to do anything. I. E doesn't state she can't set up schooling and has to give me access or inform me.
And I do feel bad for the centre... It's difficult for them, but doesn't mean they can treat me with a lack of respect and not do as they state they would.
Come my hearing on the matter I will be laying out orders to add in detail and specifically. All I can do and hope the judge agrees.
Especially needed now as the trial that was set up last year for in a few months time, has been vacated. Start again with a call over late in the year.
Brings even more issues now. I highly doubt a 2020 trial and these issues are around preschool. Full time school next year with parents living an hour apart and both with ideas of how it should be. Can't even successfully plan. Considering so many schools have transition plans the year prior to full time.
just checking??? So lets say your orders read: The father shall spend time with the child from 3pm on Friday until 9am Monday.
The child care centre said they won't give you access to the child at 3pm on Friday? Because mum won't allow it? So in any other situation - IF mum drops off a kid do they stop dad picking up? Or are they treating you differently.
Mate - push comes to shove - I know it don't help but I'd be putting in a contravention / making sure the ex knows that she'll be explaining this to a judge and making sure you've got good documentation to show the child care centre is not at fault here because they are following the directions of the mother...
I'd be asking the child care centre for their policy... I'd be letting them know that you'll happily take this further and ask them who do you lodge a complaint with if they're gonna maintain the stance that one parent has the right to stop the other from seeing the kid... ask them... Just to put the wind up them.
The answer is below
Education and Early Childhood Services Registration and Standards Board of South Australia
Website: www.eecsrsb.sa.gov.au
Email: [email protected]
Address: GPO Box 1811, Adelaide, SA, 5001
Phone: 1800 882 413 (toll free)
The child care centre said they won't give you access to the child at 3pm on Friday? Because mum won't allow it? So in any other situation - IF mum drops off a kid do they stop dad picking up? Or are they treating you differently.
Mate - push comes to shove - I know it don't help but I'd be putting in a contravention / making sure the ex knows that she'll be explaining this to a judge and making sure you've got good documentation to show the child care centre is not at fault here because they are following the directions of the mother...
I'd be asking the child care centre for their policy... I'd be letting them know that you'll happily take this further and ask them who do you lodge a complaint with if they're gonna maintain the stance that one parent has the right to stop the other from seeing the kid... ask them... Just to put the wind up them.
The answer is below
Education and Early Childhood Services Registration and Standards Board of South Australia
Website: www.eecsrsb.sa.gov.au
Email: [email protected]
Address: GPO Box 1811, Adelaide, SA, 5001
Phone: 1800 882 413 (toll free)
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Thanks... I contact them for an opinion.
Our orders basically on state
Equal and shared parentislly responsibility
The mother shall drop the daughter to the father at x time to x premises at the commencement of his time
The father shall drop the daughter to the mother at x time to x premises at the commencement of the mothers time.
No denigrating
Use communication book to discuss health, education and sleep.
It was in my time when I went there under orders, but they changed tatic quickly to saying no handover has taken place between us so it's not my time.
Further note. 28 days now. I've had 3 phone conversations only. No more than 30 mins in total. The mother is always listening in and distracting her. Plus each time a combo of her parents and boyfriend can be heard in the background also.. Listening in.
By now I've missed like 15 days in total.
Over the last 4 days now including today.
Day 1. Messaged to call and talk. Other parent ignored completely.
Day 2. Ignored, then sent a message.... I will call tomorrow when I'm available to be with her.
During this time I had enough... Wanted to do a welfare check. The officer called her. She wouldn't cause she was working and the daughter was with her boyfriend at his residence until she's home at 8.30pm.
Now who she leaves our daughter alone with in time that's surpossed to be hers is her prerogative, but I as a parent can't see my daughter or even talk to her alone, but her boyfriends who she's never identified is OK to have privacy?
Day 3... Tried calling. Apparently at 6.30pm she's already asleep and will be out for the night. I was told I will speak to her in the morning.
I know my daughter and that's not the case. She falls asleep easily on long drives. Within 30 to 60 mins after taking her out of the car she's always up and about.
Day 4 morning... Sent a message about calling. Got ignored. Tried calling. She rejected the call after like 1 ring. Tried again thinking maybe it's the lines. Call rejected again.
It's just so amazing that they are allowed to get away with this.
mate they're not allowed to get away with it.. BUT you gotta keep your cool.
When you get back in front of the judge and haven't seen your kid for ages the ex is gonna get a very clear explanation that she is a tool.
Ok, for your welbeing. Mate, I've been there. I gave up on phone calls. IT was just a reminder that the ex was winning. Your kid is very young... Be patient... You have lots of years ahead. So it really is important that you just keep your wits about you. Think of it this way. The ex is helping you. See in family law there are really only two options.
Option 1 - both parents are tools.
Option 2 - One parent is a tool and the other is a human.
The judge has to work out which option exists... You need to make sure the judge understands that you are a human. Meanwhile, the ex is doing a great job of making sure the judge knows she is a tool. So clearly this case is option 2.
When you get back in front of the judge and haven't seen your kid for ages the ex is gonna get a very clear explanation that she is a tool.
Ok, for your welbeing. Mate, I've been there. I gave up on phone calls. IT was just a reminder that the ex was winning. Your kid is very young... Be patient... You have lots of years ahead. So it really is important that you just keep your wits about you. Think of it this way. The ex is helping you. See in family law there are really only two options.
Option 1 - both parents are tools.
Option 2 - One parent is a tool and the other is a human.
The judge has to work out which option exists... You need to make sure the judge understands that you are a human. Meanwhile, the ex is doing a great job of making sure the judge knows she is a tool. So clearly this case is option 2.
Thanks... I get that.
But the other side is the judge looks at most importantly... The best interests of the child.
Legal advice so far temporarily has made it clear. It doesn't matter what affect this has on me, or what I'm being denied.
It's about our child.
Fully just expecting now, no make up of time in a row... As they will argue its bad for our child.
Expecting them to pull out a... Well the child has a consistent showing at x school, it's in her best interests to stay with the mother more and go to x school near the mother next year now, since the other ones all broken up and missed time on.
I know that's probley tin foil hat conspiracy, but her lawyer is shady and quite frankly fairly incompitent, and would definitely know there's nothing I can do about her withholding our child. That's been my silver lining to self representation. A compitent lawyer would make this even more difficult.
On the other hand though. With a compitent lawyer, discussing issues, trying mediation etc... Who knows where we would be.
She had one of those at first and changed. I'm guessing they dumped her (if lawyers can do that). They left rather abruptly at a directions hearing when they announced it to the judge. Said they where only here for this now as a courtesy.
she was constantly saying her lawyer said I don't have to tell you this... Or they said I don't have to do that.
When that was brought up to the previous lawyer... Very quickly she was all of a sudden very forthcoming with what was a harsh no a few days earlier.
Unlike this one who Im still awaiting a response from a letter sent in sept 2019, that was apparently in the mail last year. Who went into a callover filing no paperwork that was ordered by the judge and didn't even send me anything about my daughter being withheld until 3 days after the fact.
But the other side is the judge looks at most importantly... The best interests of the child.
Legal advice so far temporarily has made it clear. It doesn't matter what affect this has on me, or what I'm being denied.
It's about our child.
Fully just expecting now, no make up of time in a row... As they will argue its bad for our child.
Expecting them to pull out a... Well the child has a consistent showing at x school, it's in her best interests to stay with the mother more and go to x school near the mother next year now, since the other ones all broken up and missed time on.
I know that's probley tin foil hat conspiracy, but her lawyer is shady and quite frankly fairly incompitent, and would definitely know there's nothing I can do about her withholding our child. That's been my silver lining to self representation. A compitent lawyer would make this even more difficult.
On the other hand though. With a compitent lawyer, discussing issues, trying mediation etc... Who knows where we would be.
She had one of those at first and changed. I'm guessing they dumped her (if lawyers can do that). They left rather abruptly at a directions hearing when they announced it to the judge. Said they where only here for this now as a courtesy.
she was constantly saying her lawyer said I don't have to tell you this... Or they said I don't have to do that.
When that was brought up to the previous lawyer... Very quickly she was all of a sudden very forthcoming with what was a harsh no a few days earlier.
Unlike this one who Im still awaiting a response from a letter sent in sept 2019, that was apparently in the mail last year. Who went into a callover filing no paperwork that was ordered by the judge and didn't even send me anything about my daughter being withheld until 3 days after the fact.
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