QLD Chances of Getting 50/50 Custody of Children?

[Angel1406]

Hi. My Husband has major concerns for his children's well being as their Mother manipulates them, and keeps very important information from us. We have had to fight just to see them every fortnight (2 phone calls on non-visit weeks).

That cost us lots of money $$$ but we have realised it's not a good environment for them to be in anymore (custody of children). Usually it works on the Mother's side. She also loves the child support we pay her so would not want to agree to the 50/50. What are the chances?

Please help.x

 

[AllForHer]

My first question before I can give any real direction is what led to current arrangements? Were they made with a parenting plan, consent orders or parenting orders?

 

[Sophea]

As a general response, if a court was deciding custody arrangements, their primary concern is the best interests of the child. http://www.legalaid.vic.gov.au/find...t-court-considers-when-making-parenting-order

This website may provide a helpful guide as to what the court takes into consideration.

 

[jo-anne]

I haven't posted before, but your post sounds similar to my situation. We have consent orders from 2011 when my husbands children were only 3 and 5 (now 6 and 8). We also only have them every fortnight, and I would like to get them changed so we can have them 50/50. We also had a baby since court who is almost 1, so I think that should help with getting them more often. I worked out thaough that it will cost more to have them ourselves than the child support we pay (well, it's my husband who pays to support really - they are his kids). I have tried to get along with their mother - even suggested counselling for all of us, & mediation but she refused. She is abusive to me, texts me, posts things about me on the internet, and tries to turn the kids against their dad and me & uses the kids as an excuse to talk to my husband all the time - it's bordering harassment. So I understand when you say not a good environment for them.

Maybe one of the knowledgeable people on here could help with what the process is to get the orders changed, and what the likelihood would be of getting 50/50. We did try and do mediation as mentioned, but she refused so we have a certificate.
thanks so much

 

[AllForHer]

Getting 50/50 shouldn't be as hard as it actually is because it must be considered if orders for shared parental responsibility are to be made by the court. However, one of the leading factors they consider is the capacity of the parents to communicate. Many parents create extraordinary conflict with the intent of showing the court communication is too poor to facilitate 50/50 care arrangements, which is a blatant flaw in the laws around children's matters. In the context of social issues, I think it's also a bit negligent for the court to try and force two people who can't stand each other to try and get along - if they could get along, they would probably still be together, wouldn't they?

Legally speaking, you would need to file an initiating application to the court with an affidavit showing why your husband and his ex can effectively facilitate 50/50 care to the best interests of the child. It's not a common outcome simply because the fact that it's in court shows the parents can't cooperate that well, and of course, there is the risk that your husband may end up with less time. It's not likely, but it's still a possibility. I would pitch your case to a solicitor and get some more guidance based on the details of your situation.

 

[jo-anne]

Thanks for your reply allforher. You make good sense. Unfortunately we can't really afford a solicitor. I was hoping we could try and do it ourselves. It's sounding very tricky though. thanks

 

[AllForHer]

We are self-representing in our case, which is similar to yours but not as progressed, and like you, we can't justify throwing thousands from my step-daughter's future away on solicitors.

Self-representing is stressful, but given that you already have orders, you should have an idea of what to expect and what to do.

We have found that meeting with a Legal Aid solicitor before and after hearings helps a lot. They provide free legal advice so you can get some direction and insight about what happened in each hearing and what will happen next.

It would be worthwhile booking an appointment just for some guidance.

 

[247mum]

So, hilariously, I am the mum in this situation.
All is not as portrayed here by the poster.
I will leave it at that.

 

[AllForHer]

Stories like this one are a dime a dozen in family law, and there are always two sides to them.