NSW Relocation with My Child - Apply to Family Court?

[MiaM70]

Hello,

I want to move with my nine year old child from Wollongong to Cronulla. The distance from where I propose to live to where the father of the child lives is 50 minute's drive. I currently live in Dapto which is 25 minutes from the father's house.

The reasons why I want to leave are as follows:

1/ My work prospects are greatly increased, as will be the potential to earn a greater wage. I attempted to find work in Wollongong for two years and the only offers of jobs were for shift work, or commuting up to Sydney.

2/ I grew up in Cronulla and feel very homesick down in Wollongong

3/ My family live in Cronulla and we would receive a lot of support from them, including out of school care for my son.

His father is against this move and is threatening to take me to court over it. We do not have formal custody arrangements in place and currently share care.

I would be happy to arrange fortnightly weekend visits as well as school holidays visits with his father, however he will not negotiate with me.

Can you please help if I need to apply to the family court in this instance?

Regards,

 

[Migz]

With no formal orders in place, you can just pack up and leave along with your child. It will then be upto the father to do all of the paperwork and kicking off mediation, etc etc. Now if it does make it to court which would more than likely not be until atleast 6 months away, should the father start the ball rolling tomorrow, for example, then by that time you will have resettled and your son will be at a new school, and surrounded by family.

So what might happen, well, if Dad is paying child support, and it was you who moved away, then some judges might tell you to do all of the travelling back and forth for Dads visitations. Other judges might tell you to move back to Wollongong, to facilitate the Father Child relationship. And 90% of Judges will do absolutely nothing.

 

[MiaM70]

Thankyou Migz. I'm happy to do the travelling to be honest, although it would mean that I would be leaving late on Friday night and then picking him up on Sunday night. The father may prefer to pick him up from school Friday afternoons and return him Monday mornings though so that he gets more time with him.

I don't have a problem with them seeing each other at all, its just that it is very difficult to find suitable work down here, and commuting isn't ideal because my son would be in long day care every week day. I don't have any support down here and the father works afternoon shift...so can't help there either.

Thanks again for your response.

 

[AllForHer]

Sure, you can do as you please without orders.

But so can dad.

What happens if dad goes and collects the child from school one day and takes him back to his home town to live without your consent? I mean, he's already settled there, isn't he?

Have you considered letting the child live with dad while you pursue your career?

 

[sammy01]

So yep you can move without dad's consent... But I think it a bad idea. If dad takes it to court (and by the sounds of things he will?) and you have moved without consent it looks bad. Now the other problem is that dad has significant time (you mentioned shared care) so if that is 50/50 for example, then I think you will have a tough case going forward.

If the move substantially impacts on dad's capacity to spend time with the child that is a problem. It would be different if dad only had every other weekend.

 

[MiaM70]

So yep you can move without dads consent... BUT i think it a bad idea. If dad takes it to court (and by the sounds of things he will?) and you have moved without consent it looks bad. Now the other problem is that dad has significant time (you mentioned shared care) so if that is 50/50 for example then I think you will have a tough case going forward.

If the move substantially impacts on dad's capacity to spend time with the child that is a problem. It would be different if dad only had every other weekend.

Thank you Sammy. I have him 80% of the time. I would suggest to the father that he could have our child from Friday afternoon to Monday morning every second weekend, and would also ask that he spends more regular time with him in the school holidays.

Currently the holiday arrangement is very ad hoc and depends on if the father has enough annual leave because he spends a lot of time on overseas holidays. He had always maintained that he cannot have our son through the week because of his shift work. To be honest that has suited me because I don't like some of his methods re raising our child.

 

[MiaM70]

Sure, you can do as you please without orders.

But so can dad.

What happens if dad goes and collects the child from school one day and takes him back to his home town to live without your consent? I mean, he's already settled there, isn't he?

Have you considered letting the child live with dad while you pursue your career?

Thank you Allforher. It's a good point. He has always maintained that he cannot have our child for more than 20% of the time because of his work and he also travels overseas regularly for social reasons. I don't agree with his methods re raising our child and while I believe it is good for him to have contact with our child, I don't want him to have more than 20%

 

[sammy01]

Ok so you mentioned shared care so I assumed 50/50 or close to it...

Look book mediation, offer dad consent orders where you do the majority of the travel.. Make sure his % of care does not substantially change. Then tell him that you're gonna move and he can apply to court to stop you... See what comes of that, consider getting a solicitor to write to him and offer consent orders and explain that you're leaving, put the onus back on him to apply to court....

But I would not recommend you move until you get a job... So you can establish the move was necessary for work... Now this is kinda problematic. Depending on your qualifications etc you want to be able to convince a judge that there are work opportunities in the Shire that don't exist in the Gong... Granted Woolongong has higher unemployment, but to be fair, commuting from Woolongong to Cronulla is not unreasonable...

 

[Clancy]

Presumably you have thought about what is best for the child? The disruption of moving, lost freinds, new school etc etc

Some people suggesting to just move is a bad idea - what if you ended up having to move back? More disruption for the child

I would highly recommend doing mediation before moving.