QLD Custody of Children - Stability for Children of 1st and 2nd Marriage?

[Jane30]

In most of the forum questions I've read, all opinions seems to be what's in the best interest of the child. My husband has 2 children (9) with his ex-wife and we have 1 together. They have had the same custody of children arrangement in place from the beginning, which is in a 4 week rotation, every Monday, 3 out of 4 Fridays and every 2nd Saturday, so we have 1 weekend free. Recently for about a month, 1 child was sick every week and that child wanted to stay with their mum rather than us, and we agreed to it. Now their mother has said that we need to have them every weekend for the rest of the year to make up for the time she had them. So for the last 3 months we have not had a weekend free, which has been stressful.

I would like a better structure in place to avoid these issues

Things have changed since the original arrangement was put in place, but my husband doesn't think Family Court would agree to any change. We struggle at times to have his children want to stay with us as they prefer staying with their mum. I feel that all the moving around isn't good for the children as the days are so mixed up. We would like all 5 days in 1 group but the ex-wife won't allow it.

I am being selfish here too, the most important thing for me is that I would like some stability for our child. Does the family court take into consideration a child from a 2nd marriage or is it only the children from the 1st marriage?

 

[AllForHer]

It only considers what's best for the children of the case, and other children are considered as siblings that the children of the case should have a relationship with.

But the argument for more stable routines for the children of the case is very relevant. You could argue that the number of changeovers is disruptive and makes it difficult for children to transition and settle between households. It'll also be harder for your own child to build a meaningful relationship with them when their presence is fairly unpredictable.

The court is very willing to change a care arrangement if the existing arrangements are not in the best interests of the kids, and what you've described sounds needlessly complicated, like why not just have the kids for five consecutive nights a fortnight on alternate Friday's to Wednesday mornings?

If the number of nights remains the same, then I can't see why this should be an issue for the court. Maybe organise family dispute resolution to discuss it with the mother and see what happens.

 

[Jane30]

It only considers what's best for the children of the case, and other children are considered as siblings that the children of the case should have a relationship with.

But the argument for more stable routines for the children of the case is very relevant. You could argue that the number of changeovers is disruptive and makes it difficult for children to transition and settle between households. It'll also be harder for your own child to build a meaningful relationship with them when their presence is fairly unpredictable.

The court is very willing to change a care arrangement if the existing arrangements are not in the best interests of the kids, and what you've described sounds needlessly complicated, like why not just have the kids for five consecutive nights a fortnight on alternate Friday's to Wednesday mornings?

If the number of nights remains the same, then I can't see why this should be an issue for the court. Maybe organise family dispute resolution to discuss it with the mother and see what happens.

Thank you, that answer has really helped