I am one of four remaining siblings. Two of my siblings live in supported care, sister has multiple health issues and is wheelchair bound. Younger brother has Down's syndrome. Two brothers died many years ago, one had a son who is now 30.
I have recently been told I am not included in my mother's will. We have an amicable relationship except where my older brother is concerned, we disagreed on an ethical issue decades ago and have spoken rarely since. My brother is the first born, dominant and manipulative. I as second born and first female and as such have worked hard to carry out that role responsibly as a child and as an adult, continuing after I had my family, and helping to care for my father during a long illness and subsequent death. Then focusing on my mother.
When each of my brothers died, we all grieved terribly. For years after my mother was depressed, as you would understand, and I was often the fallout guy for her outbursts of anger and unresolved grief. I tolerated these regular, damaging episodes because of what she was enduring, although she refused professional help. I, also was grieving and struggling. And attempting to deal with my marital problems. I lived close to my mother.
My older brother lived few hours away. It seemed to develop into a scenario of good child/bad child, I was of course the bad child. Even though I was the one doing many things for her and seeing her and my siblings often. It was during one of those periods where she had been particularly abusive towards myself and one of my daughters and I had temporarily pulled back for self preservation, that I've been told the new will was made and I was excluded. This was 12 years ago. She won't consent to me seeing the will. I assumed we would be co-executors. This would ensure a balanced perspective. My brother is sole executor of the will.
I am concerned. I need to advocate for my siblings. Should their living situations change I am unsure as to what would happen. Also my nephew, who was originally left a substantial inheritance but contact was lost and only recently been renewed. My mother told me my brother told her not to worry about this inheritance being given so I am assuming he had that changed in the will of 12 years ago. Secondly, I feel I should be included.
Morally I feel I have done the best that I could. When I approached my mother about my feelings, re, that my brother and I should be co-executors (with my daughter as silent third party), initially she avidly rebuked me. Then appeared to have a change of heart and said yes that is the right and fair thing to do. A week later she abused me for raising the topic, especially in front of my daughter and yelled if I wanted anything changed I would have to convince my brother and that if he agreed, she would agree, as it was his will!
By now you may have an idea of situation I find myself in. He will not include me in will.
What chance of success would I have contesting the will on behalf of my siblings and also myself? What steps do I need to take in contesting a will? Any other advice? Thank you for your time in considering my dilemma.
I have recently been told I am not included in my mother's will. We have an amicable relationship except where my older brother is concerned, we disagreed on an ethical issue decades ago and have spoken rarely since. My brother is the first born, dominant and manipulative. I as second born and first female and as such have worked hard to carry out that role responsibly as a child and as an adult, continuing after I had my family, and helping to care for my father during a long illness and subsequent death. Then focusing on my mother.
When each of my brothers died, we all grieved terribly. For years after my mother was depressed, as you would understand, and I was often the fallout guy for her outbursts of anger and unresolved grief. I tolerated these regular, damaging episodes because of what she was enduring, although she refused professional help. I, also was grieving and struggling. And attempting to deal with my marital problems. I lived close to my mother.
My older brother lived few hours away. It seemed to develop into a scenario of good child/bad child, I was of course the bad child. Even though I was the one doing many things for her and seeing her and my siblings often. It was during one of those periods where she had been particularly abusive towards myself and one of my daughters and I had temporarily pulled back for self preservation, that I've been told the new will was made and I was excluded. This was 12 years ago. She won't consent to me seeing the will. I assumed we would be co-executors. This would ensure a balanced perspective. My brother is sole executor of the will.
I am concerned. I need to advocate for my siblings. Should their living situations change I am unsure as to what would happen. Also my nephew, who was originally left a substantial inheritance but contact was lost and only recently been renewed. My mother told me my brother told her not to worry about this inheritance being given so I am assuming he had that changed in the will of 12 years ago. Secondly, I feel I should be included.
Morally I feel I have done the best that I could. When I approached my mother about my feelings, re, that my brother and I should be co-executors (with my daughter as silent third party), initially she avidly rebuked me. Then appeared to have a change of heart and said yes that is the right and fair thing to do. A week later she abused me for raising the topic, especially in front of my daughter and yelled if I wanted anything changed I would have to convince my brother and that if he agreed, she would agree, as it was his will!
By now you may have an idea of situation I find myself in. He will not include me in will.
What chance of success would I have contesting the will on behalf of my siblings and also myself? What steps do I need to take in contesting a will? Any other advice? Thank you for your time in considering my dilemma.
