Hello.
My daughter is turning 5 this year.
From birth, her father came to see her roughly 5 weekends before her first birthday. After her first birthday, I never heard from him until a year later when his sister asked if i would bring my daughter to them for a visit. I gladly agreed because i wanted my daughter to know her family from her fathers side.
I drove my daughter about an hour drive to their home. Her father was there so i told her that was her daddy and to go give him a hug.
So she did, but he pretended to sleep... I stood there watching my baby girl poking her dad saying daddy, hello! And he gave zero response to her after 1 year of not seeing her.
My daughter's fathers, sister had tears in her eyes because she was a new mother and didnt understand how her brother was ignoring his own daughter... so she told him to go into the room and close the door if that is the way he is going to act. (Which he did) then my girl would knock on the door still trying to get his attention... I was going to take my daughter and leave but My daughters father's, sister went through so much effort preparing food and gifts so i felt rude to leave. Once the day was finished, we were leaving and He finally said something to her .. "goodbye"
Even after the neglect he showed that day, I still tried to contact him to see if he would try get to know his daughter, but I have had zero response til this day almost 3 years later. He has my number and my Address and knew my door was always open for him to get to know our daughter...
Until recently, i realised i am done trying to get him to get to know our daughter we made together.. I have given up after 4 long years of trying.
When we split whilst i was pregnant.. ALL i asked was for him to be in her life.. took me 4 years to realise he clearly doesn't want to so i figured i would possibly consider applying for child support... (still undecided)
I have this thought that if I did apply for it one day he will appear and try to take Our daughter away from me.. My real question is.. Can he do that? I dont do drugs, i don't drink. I am literally all about my child, I am unsure about him considering he hasn't made contact with me but last i knew, he was smoking marijuana with his new girlfriend he had and was living with her then and he use to sell it for his Mother.
I wouldnt deny visitation if he ever asked as long as i am there for the first couple of times due to her not seeing him for years and possibly being scared and me not knowing what he is like now.
Could he get custody of her, out of the blue without even reaching out to see her?
I have the same question going around in my mind, thinking what will happen.. after all these years trying to get him to know her then randomly him coming and trying to get full custody..
I know it's unlikely to happen but the thought of it just hurts my head.
How high is his chances ...
I personally won't agree to shared custody nor for him to have full custody. Maybe over time if he made more appearances in babies life and she got to know him and grew to love him Then yes! I would definitely agree to shared custody (If it was to ever happen)
For now though I just want to know from this experience i am going through, If he would still have a chance to completely take her?
Thanks.
My daughter is turning 5 this year.
From birth, her father came to see her roughly 5 weekends before her first birthday. After her first birthday, I never heard from him until a year later when his sister asked if i would bring my daughter to them for a visit. I gladly agreed because i wanted my daughter to know her family from her fathers side.
I drove my daughter about an hour drive to their home. Her father was there so i told her that was her daddy and to go give him a hug.
So she did, but he pretended to sleep... I stood there watching my baby girl poking her dad saying daddy, hello! And he gave zero response to her after 1 year of not seeing her.
My daughter's fathers, sister had tears in her eyes because she was a new mother and didnt understand how her brother was ignoring his own daughter... so she told him to go into the room and close the door if that is the way he is going to act. (Which he did) then my girl would knock on the door still trying to get his attention... I was going to take my daughter and leave but My daughters father's, sister went through so much effort preparing food and gifts so i felt rude to leave. Once the day was finished, we were leaving and He finally said something to her .. "goodbye"
Even after the neglect he showed that day, I still tried to contact him to see if he would try get to know his daughter, but I have had zero response til this day almost 3 years later. He has my number and my Address and knew my door was always open for him to get to know our daughter...
Until recently, i realised i am done trying to get him to get to know our daughter we made together.. I have given up after 4 long years of trying.
When we split whilst i was pregnant.. ALL i asked was for him to be in her life.. took me 4 years to realise he clearly doesn't want to so i figured i would possibly consider applying for child support... (still undecided)
I have this thought that if I did apply for it one day he will appear and try to take Our daughter away from me.. My real question is.. Can he do that? I dont do drugs, i don't drink. I am literally all about my child, I am unsure about him considering he hasn't made contact with me but last i knew, he was smoking marijuana with his new girlfriend he had and was living with her then and he use to sell it for his Mother.
I wouldnt deny visitation if he ever asked as long as i am there for the first couple of times due to her not seeing him for years and possibly being scared and me not knowing what he is like now.
Could he get custody of her, out of the blue without even reaching out to see her?
I have the same question going around in my mind, thinking what will happen.. after all these years trying to get him to know her then randomly him coming and trying to get full custody..
I know it's unlikely to happen but the thought of it just hurts my head.
How high is his chances ...
I personally won't agree to shared custody nor for him to have full custody. Maybe over time if he made more appearances in babies life and she got to know him and grew to love him Then yes! I would definitely agree to shared custody (If it was to ever happen)
For now though I just want to know from this experience i am going through, If he would still have a chance to completely take her?
Thanks.
