NSW 12 year old does not want to see his father

[Beth_liagas]

Hi my 12 year son does not want to see his father. He has not had any interaction with his father for nearly three years as his father mistreated him and now his father wants to see him again.
We did do a parenting consent order 11 years however the courts rejected it as it needed to be amended, the amendments were not done therefore we do not have one approved by the courts.
Also I have become recently seperated from my son step dad and the father is trying to enforce that my son has no contact with him.
Can you please advise
Thanks

 

[sammy01]

if you want the son to spend time with step dad - that is your choice. The family law act does protect all individuals who have been part of the kid's life.

So what about dad? Look I think you should encourage the kid to spend time with dad. A few hours here or there. Without court orders you don't have to.... But i think it the right thing to do. If the kid refuses, or preferably refuses after spending some time with dad then dad can do the whole family court thing. BUT you'll look good for trying

 

[Beth_liagas]

Thank you for your advice
My son feels unsafe with his father therefore does it need to be at his place..can it be in a public place

 

[sammy01]

sure - look you really do have control over this situation. Some common sense advice to son about what if's. But if dad is trying to mend his ways then I reckon you ought to give it a go.

 

[GlassHalfFull]

I wouldn't necessarily recommend professional supervision as the first choice because it's an extremely sterile and controlled environment for both the father and the child (which has the potential to be damaging to the relationship in itself), but if that would make you and your son more comfortable about safety, you could insist on that, at least initially. It's common in situations where the child hasn't had contact for a while and where there are allegations of risk.

Like Sammy said, without court orders, you can do whatever you want, but it would look better for you to have tried to take steps that factor in everyone's wants and rights. And one benefit to supervision is that each session is documented by the worker and if there are any issues that need to be addressed in court, you will have an independent witness to them.